September 12, 2012

I always check on my kids before I go to bed at night. I like to know they’re safe and comfortable. There’s something about a sleeping child that makes me swoon a little. And I know I won’t always be able to do this. I know that someday, she’ll be all grown up. She’ll be 18, and might say stuff like

“Screw you Mom, I’m moving in with Chad.”

I’ll be glad I’ve captured moments like these.

 

SHARE
September 10, 2012

8 – 16 Weeks

Infant Sleep

What happens next? Will it always be like this? Those unpredictable, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants first couple months?  Very fortunately, no! There are some important milestones to look for that let parents and care providers know that their child is ready to become a more organized sleeper. . .

At around 6-8 weeks, you’re going to start noticing some changes in your baby. Sleep is starting to get more organized, and they’re moving away from those random days and nights. Here are some things to be on the watch for:

1) Smiles:  Parents have a long couple months of thankless work. You’re on call 24-7 to ensure your little person is fed, cleaned, loved and content, leaving you depleted of energy and strength.  It blows my mind that right when you need them the most, they first appear. Smiles mean your baby recognizes you and can communicate their happiness to see you. Those first smiles are beautiful and heart melting, and now you know that it’s also a sign that they’re getting more mature and so will their sleep patterns.

2) Witching Hour: You might not know what a “witching” hour is, but if you’ve been around a newborn, you’ll probably experience it if you haven’t already. As babies become more mature, they typically have an extremely difficult part of the day. That time is usually in the early evening. It’s not a pleasant time – for you or your child. There’s likely to be a lot of fussiness, and again, adopt a “whatever it takes” attitude to get through it. The silver lining is that it’s a sign of a maturing newborn, who will be ready for more organized sleep soon.

3) Organized Days/Nights: When the day and night sleep become more organized, this means that they are starting to spend more wakeful hours in the day and more time sleeping at night. This is often coupled with more eating during the day, and less feeding throughout the night.

4) Longer Sleep Periods: Often their longest sleep is at night, perhaps even 4-6 continuous hours.

So what does this all mean when we see these signs coming together in our child? We can see that our baby is ready to socialize, which means they’re ready to follow cues and make connections. Fortunately, this is a real opportunity for parents to start helping their child build a healthy foundation for sleep.

1) Consistent Place to Sleep: This is a really good time to introduce them, if you haven’t already, to their crib. Have their sleep environment be a calm, soothing place where they can relax, read stories, sing songs, have a feed.  Try to reduce your use of “sleep props’ – like car rides, bouncy seats, strolling, swings, soothers, nursing, etc… Remember that a long term goal of a competent sleeper is to have your child sleep comfortably in their crib. You’re setting them up for success by introducing it early.  The American Association of Pediatrics recommends room-sharing up to 1 yearCanadian Pediatric Society and the National Health Service in the UK recommends room-sharing for the first 6 months (see Canada’s Caring for Kids and the UK’s NHS).

2) Sleepy Cues – About 45 minutes into wakeful time, you might notice your baby zoning out, rubbing their ears, rubbing their eyes, turn their head from side to side, yawning, or becoming fussy. Generally, you’re trying to see if you’re baby is starting to get tired and might possibly be beginning to put themselves to sleep. Your job is to watch for these cues, (or whatever sleepy cues your baby may display), when they are getting tired. When you do notice them, this is your opportunity to take baby to their consistent sleeping place. They might put themselves to sleep, or they might need you to go through a bit of a soothing routine….

3) Soothing Routine – If you haven’t already, start working on an ENJOYABLE and peaceful routine to follow before each sleep time. Naptime and bedtimes are likely to have a similar routine. Cuddling, nursing/feeding, stories, lullabies – anything you and your child find relaxing.  You might not be able to complete the routine if your child is obviously ready to go down for a sleep, so don’t feel obligated to go through the whole thing. Keep in mind, that your routine is something you’re likely to adapt and evolve as your child becomes older, but it should be a pleasant time for both of you.  Visit this post for more soothing routine inspiration.

 

We don’t have any strict rules at this age, and there’s still not a lot of structure from day to day. This age is a phase for  parents to be respectful of their baby’s high sleep needs, to practice identifying sleepy cues and develop their soothing routine. Optimizing conditions for sleep in the early stages can set your child up for successful sleep habits as they become older.

SHARE
September 5, 2012

Magnets

Quiet Time Activities

Just a baking tray and magnets from the dollar store. We had number magnets. Letter magnets or pretty much any other magnets you can find would work too. There are even some downloadable activities to print and put on your trays here and here.

I set this up on an easel for her for a couple reasons:

1) It’s just easier for her to manipulate when she’s standing and facing her task.

2) Her room is small. She often ends up hanging out on her bed. Which isn’t a huge deal, but keeping the bed just for sleeping is consistent with what I suggest when I’m consulting with families.

Wander over to Pinterest for more Terrific Quiet Time inspiration.

SHARE
September 3, 2012

Newborn Sleep – ages 0 – 8 weeks(ish)

Infant Sleep Tips

I run a weekly Q+A session over on my Facebook page.  I call it Terrific Talk Tuesdays, but really, it’s a virtual sleep clinic.  Sleepy parents ask, I answer.

An interesting question came up this week during Terrific Talk Tuesday:

We have a new baby on the way, and I’m wondering what advice you have to set the baby up to be a successful sleeper. In other words, if you could do it all over again, what strategies would you implement right from the beginning?

I try to answer these questions quickly, given the bit of information I’m given, I’m providing the bit of information I feel will be helpful.  Often, my quick answers don’t do the questions justice.  But I feel this was a great question to elaborate on. In fact, this is the first installment of an Infant Sleep Series.

Are we really equipped for what we’re getting into? When we’re expecting, we read the books.  We buy cute little outfits and decorate cute little nurseries.  We get weekly updates from Baby Center so we know the size of our baby, relative to a fruit or vegetable.  We might see Snooki’s or Jessica Simpson’s Twitter feeds and have an idea of what to expect with a newborn, but are we really prepared for what to expect, after we’re expecting?

I know I wasn’t prepared for the depth and breadth of my exhaustion when we had our son.  While there are a lot of things I wish I knew then that I know now, the top of that long list is knowledge about sleep.  As a new parent, you’re going to get tired.  But there are things you can do in the early stages to create healthy sleep habits.

What’s ‘normal’? 

Newborns typically do a few things. They eat, and they sleep . . .  oh, and they cry too. Their sleep needs are as high as 20 hours per day. You can expect most of that sleep will come in the form of long and short naps. Remember newborns have TINY tummies and will need to feed often. What often drives their waking cycles is the need to eat.

That means that sleep can be erratic.  You might look for patterns, but you’ll be hard pressed to find any.  So take sleep when it comes.  That may mean your baby sleeps more in the day than in the night in the beginning.

What should I do?

Here’s some suggestions to help you cope:

1) Whatever it takes – This is your new motto. Embrace it. Keep your baby as well rested as possible. You may need to help your baby to sleep.  Don’t worry about spoiling your baby or forming any “bad habits” (like nursing/feeding to sleep).  It’s too early for habits to stick and it’s really too early for patterns and biological rhythms to emerge.

2) Take care of yourself – Ensure you’re eating well, drinking lots and sleeping as well as possible. Only if you’re taking care of yourself can you take care of the new life in your hands.  This means protecting your sleep too.  Split “shifts” with your partner if possible, and/or enlist the help of willing and capable grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins and friends.

3) Enjoy your baby – Be responsive to their cries, you’re not going to spoil them or get them into any bad habits at this point.  Marvel at the miracle your baby is.  Get to know each other.  You’re in this for the long haul, so you might as well be friends.

Stay tuned for next week as we look beyond, into the 8-16 week old range.

SHARE